Have you heard what you throw into the universe, comes back to you magnified!!

The other day I heard the discussion on how desi marriages are not the same anymore and the divorce rate is so high as compared to the last generation. The irony is no one can understand that Women refuse to be treated like a   doormat like last generation therefore, they speak for their rights and end up in divorce. Probably the men are not much changed, the way in-laws’ families work is not changed but yes the way women think is changed now. 

I feel marriage or no marriage, but women should be financially independent. Sara moved to the UK from Pakistan 20 years ago. When she came, she had no idea how things work in the new country and she started working fulltime to be independent from her husband, so he doesn’t bear all the finances. As she worked and paid fair share in housekeeping, like food and furniture. He was paying off his loans. After a few years he decided to buy a house to make more income by leasing it.so he took another loan. In another 10 years he bought the second house. After 20 years of marriage he decided to leave her, and he put her on the street with a suitcase. Conclusion: he owns 2 houses and she owns nothing. She invested at housekeeping, their lifestyle and other expenses at home but these costs disappear because it was not an investment. Make sure your future stays independent and your marriage is not setting up just based on finances. 

Other than that, there is outrageously idiotic thought process behind marriages.  For example; The outsider tag remains there on a daughter in law because the secrecy between a husband and parents remains there while the daughter in law is unaware of those secret moments why? because she is an outsider. The other weirdest concept is the insecurity of parents where they raise a son and make sure they control him throughout his life. Another one; difference in rules for own daughter vs daughter in law; Son in law who cooks in the kitchen is a best person however if the son does the same, he is pitied upon.  The parents don’t like that their son in law is controlled by parents but in reality, they are also doing the same. It’s a vicious cycle that needs to be broken. Times are changed women are fully capable of supporting themselves to live as individuals, as well as being part of a marital family. Therefore, next time when you judge a woman whose marriage is broken think about all the reasons that broke the marriage.

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